James Byford, an original Freerange consultant and collaborator

Posts Tagged ‘Parenting’

The joy of a natural birth at home

In Uncategorized on May 9, 2007 at 8:40 pm

One year ago today, in fact within the hour, at the time of writing, I experienced one of the moments of joy that will never leave me. My youngest daughter Harriet (Hattie) was born at home after a relatively short labour for my wife Sarah.

Labour commenced around 4.30pm and the community midwife arrived shortly after. We ate pizza, had a glass of wine and generally relaxed at home, with a playlist created for the occasion. When Hattie emerged, a track from Mercury Rev’s Deserter’s Songs was playing which seemed fitting in many ways as it was the album of our honeymoon in Umbria, seven years previously.

Compared to the complications and stress involved in giving birth at the local hospital, The Sussex County, Sarah was in her own bed, with our new bundle of joy, around midnight. The sun shone the following morning, and I, as a father, experienced a new sense of purpose. I felt more connected with nature than ever before, particularly as our 14 year old cat Betty, had managed to get into the centre of proceedings whilst Sarah was at the latter stages of labour. Climbing onto the side of the birthing pool, Betty stroked Sarah whilst she was literally giving birth. Remarkably and ever since, Betty has been like an aunty to Hattie and Flo, never scratching or lashing out as she often did with Flo, Hattie’s big sister.

So I’m glad to hear that the government is encouraging home births. It’s not for everyone and the team at the Sussex County and their genuine care is our overriding memory of the birth of our eldest daughter. We wanted a home birth the first time round and didn’t consider it a risk at all. Second time round we were fortunate to have wonderful support and treasured memories.

Malteser Blow Football Championships

In Uncategorized on March 2, 2007 at 11:40 pm

How to entertain a young child on a rainy day? In response to an old friend who tracked me down via this blog, asking me to liven it up (sarcastic wit hasn’t gone away Mr Farnsworth!), here’s a slice of Byford family life.

On parenting, violence and the need for the genuine progress indicator

In Uncategorized on February 15, 2007 at 10:53 pm

More evidence of the need for a Genuine Progress Indicator after another terrible week for children.

My belief in the need for more meaningful measures of progress has been further illustrated this week by the UNICEF report on Children’s Lifestyles and by today’s horrific news of ‘parents’ goading their 2 and 3 year old children to fight and filming themselves laughing and joking whilst the youngest was visibily distressed during this awful event.

On the latter point, I stopped eating my dinner tonight at 8pm after hearing the news on Radio 4. My wife turned the radio off after the final headline about a man raping his 2 year old niece. We both sat in silence. Sarah couldn’t hold back the tears. Having just put our beautiful, happy, daughters to bed we were speechless.

What is going on in this country? Don’t get me started.. Fortunately the wisdom of the young was acknowledged by The Independent in response to the UNICEF report by a teenager:

“The richer we become as a society, the less mature young people need to be. Too many people expect the good things but don’t want to take responsibility.”

As Sarah said, some people view children as commodities, or lifestyle accessories.

Paul Kelbie in The Independent went on to report:

“Unicef said that, compared to Holland and Sweden which came out as top places to be a child, most British children feel unloved and unsupported by a society which regards them more as a burden rather than as a valuable investment. “There is not enough to do for teenagers when they leave school. There’s no jobs and no prospects for most people,” said Ciaran McIntyre.
“Most people don’t want to live like this but they just can’t see a way out. There needs to be more help to give more people the confidence to get out there and prove to themselves they can make a better life.”

Not surprisingly, those at the top of GDP figures, the US and the UK (5th) were at the bottom of the UNICEF table. Why is this? Could be something to do with a particular attitude to violence: one that starts at the top with the perpetual fighting of wars and a lack of support for human and in particular (children’s rights) in order to support the overall growth obsession.

Rant over, I still feel sick.

From the World Bank:

Total GDP 2005
(millions of US dollars)

1 United States 12,455,068
2 Japan 4,505,912
3 Germany 2,781,900
4 China 2,228,862
5 United Kingdom 2,192,553
16 Netherlands 594,755
20 Sweden 354,115

LINKS:

UNICEF: Report Card 7, Child Poverty in Perspective: An Overview of Child Well-being in Rich Countries
BBC News story
Independent
Full GDP list